I am being coddled at the moment, as I am currently in Sonoma Valley (at the Mighty Summit), enjoying wine and the company of 28 other amazing, interesting, funny women. And as I’ve met each one and been asked the question, “And what do you do?/where do you blog?/what’s your story?” I’ve had that moment where I paused, the words all kind of jumbled in my head. What am I doing? And gee, does this actually count as blogging? And what the heck is my story?
I do then manage to spurt out the list of all the really cool, fun, interesting things I’m working on right now: BlogHerMoms, FoodieParent, this blog (occasionally), writing for Martha Stewart Living, working on my next book proposal.
And as I hear all their stories—similar hypenates and “and and and”s—I am enlivened by all the options, all the opportunities out there. The very PLENTY of it all is amazing.
So now I know I’ve turned a corner. The world is no longer this screaming blankness of WTF do I do next? Instead it’s an array of choices, a tangled assortment of pathways, a series of doors sliding open and closed, open and closed. And I’m just walking toward them all, waiting until it’s clearer what my choice will be. Or maybe just clearer that I won’t make a choice. And it will all be fine, anyway.
It’s amazing what good company does. Being surrounded by a bunch of women who have done amazing things, big and small, who are making it work by the seat of their pants, who have found success and survived failure, and, most important, who all have big, mighty hearts, has reminded me that I am one of them. And I have always been one of them, even when (maybe especially when) I was struggling to find my way.