Author Archives: stacy

About stacy

I am a writer, author, mother, former magazine editor (last at Redbook), optimist, and, above all, a searcher. I'm still searching for whom I'm really meant to be, after a series of very jarring losses: a divorce and house disaster that led to a book (Falling Apart In One Piece); a week after the book came out, my parents suddenly fell gravely ill, I resigned from my job (and, apparently, my career), my son went into crisis, my parents then rapidly died four weeks apart, and my boyfriend (who had moved in with me and my son just weeks before the book came out) began the painful journey of realizing we couldn't make our relationship work (that story unfolded on this blog). Since then I've been trying to figure out what's next. Or, in other words, how to fill in the blanks.

A Flash of Light in the Forest

It’s been six, seven months since I wrote here. And those many months ago, I wrote about The Unmade Me, this peculiar sense I have of being lost in my own life. I would say I’m still pretty deep in the … Continue reading

Posted in depression, fear, loss, mother, relationship, Uncategorized, writing | 6 Comments

The Unmade Me

Sigh. Coming here makes me feel sad. I used to write. I used to get paid to write (crazy, I know). I used to get paid to write and have ideas and share those ideas and then work with wonderfully … Continue reading

Posted in depression, fear, living in the quiet, loss, starting over | Tagged , , | 34 Comments

It Hurts

  [Ed note: TL;DR, but I just had to articulate for myself what I’ve been feeling.] As someone on a Buddhist path, I am friends with suffering. By being able to reorient myself to know—to truly, deeply know—that every life … Continue reading

Posted in fear, Uncategorized | Tagged , | 3 Comments

Yes, This

A friend and reader of this blog—Ronna Detrick, a woman whose work is deepening women’s connections to their inner spiritual compass (yes, please!)—sent me this poem yesterday in response to my post. And I love it so much. Because it does say … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

And More and More and Then Still More

Last week I referred to a landslide, a great forcing up of new perspective, but I wrote about only a piece of it. It’s too much to look at at once, a view too big for the eyes and mind … Continue reading

Posted in mother, relationship, self | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

When the Tiniest Shift is a Landslide

Oh the tectonic plates of the self, how they move. Months, then years, of the tiniest little shifts, certainly almost imperceptible. And then: whooooosh! A great surging up, the creation of a mountain range, from which an entirely new, yet familiar, … Continue reading

Posted in flux, starting over, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | 9 Comments

My Son’s Beautiful Mind

So my son is dancing and singing around the house because he just got home from his last day of school, bringing home straight As for the second marking period in a row. What an incredible road it has been … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized, Zack | Tagged , , | 12 Comments

When We See the Invisible

I’m busy busy busy with a new consulting job, that I like very much. Smart people. Great products. And an excellent social impact, as well, we hope. (More on that anon, I promise. We launch soon.) So flitting about my … Continue reading

Posted in faith, gratitude, mother | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

This Is My Church

I just realized today something that should have been obvious to me years ago: this blog is my church. I come here when I am wounded and wondering, when I feel the ache of being human in a way I … Continue reading

Posted in faith, grief, loss, love | Tagged | 9 Comments

Layers of Endings

In my life, very few shifting events—those decisive moments when life goes from This to That—unfold in a solo way, happening all by itself. I seem to get disruptions in big, broad swaths, multiple aspects of my dailyness undone at once. Here … Continue reading

Posted in loss, starting over | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments